sadness overtakes another day

wearing it all on the outside

no way to hide

wishing to hide the fears and doubt

but in the end

i shout them out

wish i could stop this ride i’m on

donate my years 

where they belong

with someone nice

who fights for life

sadness overtakes

unaware the wrath it shakes

anger, fury, fear and rage

scared to tell how much it feels

like one long day that will not end

one day soon it all will end

and i’ll wish i had it all to do again

i don’t wish the end to come now

i have so much to do somehow

but i have no way to tell if this is the way

for now i sit trying not to feel

until somehow i learn to heal

sadness overtakes

i have no real reason to feel this way

but i don’t seem to make it through just one day

without the feeling that

sadness overtakes

My beautiful sunflowers are growing taller! Before I know it they’ll be much taller than me!

I wish there was a program like Doctors Without Borders for Counselors. I’d love to spend time in a country learning the language and culture, then work in that country for a year or two counseling individuals and families dealing with crisis, grief, depression, inequality and other issues that are universal but could be eased with counseling.

I feel that I have talents and skills that, when put together with issues I’m passionate about, could be the ideal way for me to live my life.  I would love to make a “career” out of this kind of work… but how does one do that?

Who do I talk to to find out HOW to create an organization like this?

How do I find out if I could work in conjunction with another organization that does something similar?  

Maybe I should teach English abroad and let the counseling become something extra that I do to help the families of the people I would teach…. ?

I’d love to hear from anyone who might have a suggestion or who knows of an organization somewhere in the world that might be similar to what I’ve described.

I look forward to learning more about it from my own research, but someone somewhere must already be doing this type of work…. so, please clue me in!

Kristy. Pondering life…. always thinking and planning, but lately everyone is wondering- “What’s keeping Kristy? Make a choice already…. you can’t keep this up! Don’t keep to yourself, keep trying. Keep to the plan. Keep your head together. Keep on top of everything. Keep your chin up. Keep everyone happy.” These are the things that I keep carrying around in my head. I can’t keep this up… the time is now.

It’s time to decide that I’m giving up the bad, negative, hurtful ways of thinking and KEEPING KRISTY.